Boundaries and self-care with zero guilt

What I like about Mindmekka’s audio tracks is that they seem to be about things that you’d think are common knowledge, but when you listen, you get a new insight and realize why you need to hear these things. 

I’m the queen of burn out. Not only do I feel like I have to be busy all the time, constantly working on projects like I’m trying to chase away depression and the feeling of being a complete human failure, but I have an incredibly hard time backing off and taking care of myself. I’m happy to do things for other people, I love helping out and taking care of anyone who asks. This isn’t me patting myself on the butt, either. I think a lot of people are like this these days. I especially notice it in the millennial generation. A lot of us grew up watching our families struggle and we just want so badly for other people to not have to go through that kind of stress. What happens is we don’t know how to set boundaries or take care of our own needs because we try to be strong for others.

For some of us, it’s that growing up we weren’t even allowed to have boundaries, so the idea is totally foreign to us. Some of my friends literally go around like they’ve never heard of the words “no, I can’t today” and so they constantly move their plans around to accomodate others. A friend of mine was once exhausted from helping someone else move into their new apartment. She didn’t even like this person but didn’t know how to say no, and she had to pay for it with her own well-being. I remember telling her she is allowed to say no and the poor thing was so upset, saying that she didn’t want to be selfish.

But sometimes, we have to be selfish for ourselves. It’s not a bad thing.

Listen to How To Start Putting Yourself First and more self improvement audio programs on Audiojoy — download free on iOS or Android.

Also published on Medium.